Being behind the wheel of a car when tempers flare can quickly turn a typical commute into an unsafe driving situation.
With drivers seeming more stressed and anxious than usual, reports of road rage have increased, and roads have become more hostile. Rates.ca reports that 56 per cent of Canadians surveyed were involved in a road rage incident in the past year, while 86 per cent have witnessed at least one. The insurance website says that road rage has gotten worse each year after 2022.
Getting cut off aggressively, not being allowed to merge, being tailgated, or yelled at can ruin anyone’s mood, but how you react to the hostility can be the difference between getting home safely or putting yourself in a dangerous situation. If you’re the recipient of another driver’s anger, the right thing to do is simple, but putting it into practice can be anything but.
“The biggest thing is staying calm,” says Sean Shapiro, a traffic safety advocate and retired Toronto Police officer. “The [other driver] may be in a situation where they’ve lost control, and you shouldn’t feed the fire because it will only get worse.”
Staying calm can involve taking deep breaths, counting to 10, or focusing on something else. But keeping cool can be difficult under the duress of driving. After all, a car is like a big metal cocoon that keeps you safe inside. When another motorist infiltrates this cozy bubble with a blast of their horn or a rude gesture, it can feel like an attack, even though, in most cases, it’s not personal. The other driver doesn’t know you; they are reacting out of anger and have probably lost control of their emotions.
“Road rage suggests that rage is what they’re experiencing, and when they’re enraged, they are no longer making good decisions,” says Shapiro.
When driving, you need to be focused and alert; when you are angered, that becomes harder. The safest thing to do is to let it go. Don’t try to be a hero or vigilante. Be the bigger person, and don’t engage, even though the urge to respond or get revenge can be intense.
“You need to stay calm and allow the situation to blow over. Maybe they’re having a bad day, but you can’t control what’s happening inside their car,” says Shapiro. “They may yell or give you the finger, but if you react to one-up them, you could escalate that to something where people get hurt.”
Your perception of what the other driver is doing is also typically skewed. If someone cuts you off in traffic, it’s very likely unintentional. Even if someone is tailgating you, the best approach would be to move over to the right lane if possible or gently slow down and hope they get the message and go around you. Some might resort to brake checking, where you tap your brakes abruptly to try and get the driver behind to back off. That can potentially lead to a collision, the last thing anyone wants.
“Brake checking someone is illegal and could leave you liable for a stunt driving charge, so you should never do that. Always be calm and allow the situation to blow over,” says Shapiro.
But what if the situation worsens, you’ve done all the right things, and an angered motorist still won’t leave you alone? Confronting someone in this state is never the right idea, according to Shapiro. You should never get out of your car and engage them or try to sort it out on the road because you just never know the mental state of the other driver. They could even be armed.
“If [they] start following you, and there’s a risk for your safety, and it feels like they're targeting you, that’s when it becomes a police matter,” says Shapiro. “When this happens, you either call 911 or drive to the closest police station.”
